Bedchamber with a young Mr. and Mrs. Bennett in four poster bed. Zoom in on bare breasts.
Mrs. Bennett: Yes, yes!
Fade Scene as above.
Mr. Bennett: Yes, yes!
Fade Scene as above.
Concerned bystander (stepping in front of camera): I don't think the book starts like this.
Director: Of course it doesn't. Get him out, someone. Okay, we've had Jane and Lizzy's conceptions, who's next?
*******
Shot of countryside. A group of young women walk across the landscape. Repeat.
*******
Grounds of Pemberly. Pond. Matthew McFadyen emerges wearing wet shirt.**********
Upstairs, the Bennett's house. Jane dressing for the ball.
Jane: Does this make my butt look big?
Zoom in on her almost naked breasts.
Elizabeth enters carrying a large basket of out of season flowers. She smiles knowingly.
*******
Shot of countryside in rain. A group of young women walk across the landscape.
*******
Grounds of Pemberly. Pond. Colin Firth emerges wearing wet shirt.*******
Bennett's garden. Unspecified number of young women run across the lawn.
*********
Grounds of Pemberly. Pond. Large male pig wallows.
********
Bedchamber. Bedchamber with Lydia and Wickham in four poster bed. Zoom in on bare breasts. Mr. Darcy enters. He glowers.
********
Grounds of Pemberly. Pond. Laurence Olivier emerges wearing wet shirt in black and white.*******
Bedchamber with Lizzie and Mr. Darcy in four poster bed. Zoom in on bare breasts.******
The Bennett sisters, topless, walk across a grassy meadow.
Director (stepping in front of camera): What the hell's this?
BBC Official: Regulations, gov. You haven't met the official BBC bare breasts quota.
Director: Oh, that's okay then. Action!
Let us know what silly things you've done today, and vote for Rules of Gentility in AAR's Annual Reader Poll --it's in the Favorite Funny category.
Going to work was the silliest thing I did today. Every single day I shake my head and wonder why I'm still there. Silly paycheck.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the heads up about AAR. I voted for TROG because I loved every page, not because I'm a kiss-@ss or anything. :-)
Do you know if the new P&P will also have shots of sheep gamboling across meadows? I am overly fond of that kind of thing. And I'm hoping for more arty shots of carriage wheels and horses hooves, too!
Oh, Janet, I SO needed this after the day I had at work. Too funny for words! Then again I am not surprised as I LOVED TROG!
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with Jane. The silliest thing I do every day is go back to my soul-sucking job. True, it does pay for little luxuries like food, toilet paper and living indoors, but there are days I wonder how much I really need those things!!
I shoveled snow. Now I long for Aleve and a rum drink in the tropics (Forbidden Shores, perhaps?).
ReplyDeleteSilly things?
ReplyDeleteI stayed up ALL NIGHT finishing my page proofs, sent them in time and went to sleep at 7:45 AM---and still got to Curves by 12:30 PM....well, 12:35
I voted for TROG
Okay, now O Divine One. No need to make the rest of us look like slackers!!
ReplyDeleteOkay, now O Divine One. No need to make the rest of us look like slackers!!
ReplyDeletehahahahahaahahha!
(of course, I've been a vegetable the rest of the day)
I've been working on two websites at once, so they might both be finished by V-day!
ReplyDeleteNot to mention that I just finished redesigning my own on a pure whim.
Oh thanks for the votes, Jane and Doglady.
ReplyDeleteI too have an exceptionally silly day job but even if I didn't I don't think I'd be nearly as industrious as Diane or Haven.
I was taken in by the first sighting of the BB. By the time the second wet shirt appeared, I was wondering what Janet had to drink. By the time the BBC regulations bit came on, I wondered no more.
ReplyDeleteThe silliest thing I did today was blow off going to Curves in the morning because I was sleepy.
Yup, I voted.